Thursday, June 21, 2012

Beat the Heat

You know that moment when it's so hot, you decide to take a lukewarm/cold shower? You turn on the water to the perfect cooling temperature and then when you hop into the shower it's scalding hot? You glare at the shower head and bitch about the stupid ass heat.

First world problems.

Folks, I don't know what area you're in, but in my city the temperature is currently at 90 and steady climbing. The heat index is supposed to be 107 today. No beuno.

I'm a summer baby and oppressive heat like this makes me mad. I'm guzzling down water like no tomorrow and angry when my thighs stick together because of the heat.

The fat girl struggle.

But, at the end of the day, when the sun goes down and the mosquitoes are buzzing around my ankles, I'm happy that I made it through another day. It could be worse folks. I'm in air-conditioning probably 80% of the day, I have access to ice water, and hopefully you are/do too.

Here's some tips to beat and deal with the heat. Feel free to add some of your own. It's a struggle out here as it gets hotter.

1. Water water water water. It is so easy to get dehydrated in the heat. We have to drink enough water, especially if we like to enjoy a good margarita after work. Carry around a nalgene, freeze a water bottle, or buy some water while you're out- but make sure you drink enough! We don't need y'all falling out.

 2. Check on the old folks.  Ladies, gents, and everyone else- we can't forget about our elders, especially in this heat. I'm sure we've all seen the news stories of older individuals dying in their homes because of the heat. Don't think just because they have an air conditioner in their window that they're using it or that they're doing okay.

3. Ice-cream. Water-ice or whatever icy treat you enjoy. Make sure you take sometime out to enjoy the nice things about summer. Getting soft-serve vanilla ice cream in chocolate dip is a treat for me. But remember not to over-indulge. Gaining weight in the summer is no fun. And folks, no matter how drunk or high you may be, just because you like ice cream, don't go and do a Gucci Mane. Ever.

4. Dress the part. Folks, just because it's hot outside doesn't mean everyone needs to see your ass, titties, belly or back fat, or anything else that needs to have a bit of fabric covering it up. Ladies, you know y'all are wrong for those outfits sometimes. In the words of Phonte: "Got the fat hangin over the sides (Better go to lane bryant). Girl, you got your gut bustin over the side of your jeans. It look like a muffin". And fellas, seriously just pull up your pants.

5. Showers, deodorant, and sunscreen. Showers folks. Whether it's cold or hot, we gotta remember to get the funk off our backs after a long hot day/night. Stale sweat is not sexy and no one wants to sit next to a funky person, especially in the heat. So please, please, please James Brown. wear some deodorant. And every skin type and color can get sun cancer and a sunburn, wear some good sunscreen. Your body will thank you.

Now that's just a few on my list for keeping cool and fresh in the heat. Please feel free to add yours! And remember folks, stick to the shade when you can.

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