Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Tasting Danger: My Foray into Craziness

After a second night (though not sequential), since I've turned 23,  of getting "Girl you are crazy!" type texts from friends, after telling yet another ridiculous story, I've realized that yes maybe I have taken a few steps too many off the deep-end. I've increasingly put myself into what could easily be dangerous situations with men, though I have had the luck and blessings not to have had any problems.

I've realized that since college, I've had different spurts of living on the edge. And right now I've been busting out.

The first guy I was involved with I met off the internet [1]. I was 18 and foolish. One of my older college friends had told me about her experiences with dating/being involved with men from the internet, and I was interested, especially because I wasn't getting any attention from the people in my tiny college environment. I wanted to feel pretty and the attention he lavished me did just that. But looking back, it was a really dumb and dangerous thing for me to do. To just meet up with a random guy I had met over the internet and talked to a few times on the phone. And to make matters worse, I didn't meet him at a public place. I met him at the bustop near his house and we ended up hanging out at his place. 

WTF was wrong with me? Naivety at it's best.

Luckily everything worked out and we ended up being involved (I refuse to call it dating) for a couple months after that. But it was still a really dangerous thing for me to do. He could have been a rapist, could have drugged me then kidnapped me, or other perfect scenarios for Law and Order SVU/CI. I was blessed not to have any of that happen. And I admit that after our affair ended, I realized I needed to be a bit more discerning about such situations and stopped any dealing with internet dating. Sure it has become more mainstream, but you still have to be careful of the weirdos/possible rapists. Sometimes it works, many times it doesn't. I'd say after that that I had a solid 4 years of safe living. I focused on my studies and getting out of college. Sure I partied, and hard at times, but I still was pretty safe...mostly [2]. But lately, I've been letting loose and losing my mind.

Maybe it's because I've finally started my adult life: having graduated, recently being accepted into graduate school, and having started a permanent job [3]. Maybe I'm feeling like I need to have a bit of fun before I get loaded down by work and classes. Or maybe I'm really getting sick of living at my parents place and this is my rebellious side kicking in. Probably a mix of all three, but either way, I've been putting myself in ridiculous situations and (thankfully) living to tell the tale.

My latest bout of ridiculousness dealt with my hanging out with two random ass guys I met on the subway one Friday night. We struck up a conversation and I found out that one was from the area and both had studied here. They were partying in a different area and I wished them luck as I went my separate way with my friends. I ended up doing BYOB bowling with my friends (best idea eva!) and then leaving before them with the intent of getting home before it got to late. (Oh the curses of living far away from downtown.) Who do I happen upon in the subway? The two random guys. Mind you they had gotten off at a different stop, yet here they were. They called it fate. I called it ridiculous. Yet and still, when they coerced invited me out for drinks, I took a gamble and said ok. It was 11pm and I knew I needed to get home because it would take more an hour at least, but I decided to take the plunge and be crazy for the night.

We ended up going to a bar I was familiar with and having a good time. They ended up fighting for my attention, which really boosted this girl's confidence. Having two guys fight over you is pretty awesome. They even offered to pay my taxi home if I stayed later with them. I politely declined but did accept the offered subway fare home. On the way home it fully struck me just how ridiculous and crazy I was. I had gone off with two random guys I had just met to a bar. They could have taken me anywhere, but they didn't. They were extremely nice and I wouldn't mind hanging with them again. But I had been blessed that I hadn't been in danger and that I hadn't ended up on the evening news.

Maybe this isn't dangerous to you guys. And maybe you're giving me the side-eye for hanging with some randos. It happened and it was fun. Will I put myself in such another situation? I don't know, but hopefully I'll use my head either way. Maybe sometimes you gotta step out and be a little crazy to experience a bit of fun and a story to tell your friends. So yes, maybe I'm a bit crazy.

Side-Note: This is just such an awesome song I had to put it here. It kinda has something to do with what I was saying. Anyway, give a listen.

[1] Y'all probably giving me the side-eye right now. Don't be acting like you've never signed up for OKCupid. Actually, this site was Blackplanet. THROWBACK! 
[2] Totally ignoring my ridiculous sophomore year. 
[3] Boss status.

Monday, July 25, 2011

Where Are All the Sistas with Voices????

Where are they? Stuck in the 90's, along with r&b music that was about more than just about popping bottles of champagne or yellow model chicks. The musical genre evolved over the course of the decade, beginning with new jack swing, while continuing to merge with hip hop and then ending with the explosion of neo-soul. I yearn for the days when r&b was more fresh and soulful. But that's not all. I am also missing girl groups. Sure there were incredible male groups from Jodeci to Mint Condition to 112, but here at sisterescape, ladies come first.

So for this Throwback Tuesday, I am going to feature just five songs from some of the best female groups of the 90's. Tell me if you approve of my selection. 

Although my favorite song by SWV was "Right There," I chose this because I know some of y'all forgot about this one. Since we're talking about sistas who were the shit in the 90's, I have to give props to Missy Elliot. She's one of the most talented and important in hip hop history.

Okay, this IS my favorite song by them.

Its okay if you all don't know this song by them, but Total was the go-to group for rappers who wanted a guaranteed hit. I could have chosen "Can't You See" or "Tell Me What You Want from Me" but this song was a sleeper.

Okay, 702 didn't have as many hits as the aforementioned groups but this song is featured on the 90's soundtrack so I had to include them.

Of course I had to include TLC. It would not have been a legitimate post if I didn't. This is my favorite girl group and this is my favorite song by them. R.I.P. Left Eye, you were an amazing talent with a vibrant spirit.

I hope my selection was enjoyable but I already know some of you are shaking your head while thinking, how in the hell could she forget____. So tell me, who would you have chosen?
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